As a mom, we are a bit more attentive to our surroundings when our children are with us. So on this particular flight, as you can imagine, I actually listened to the safety instructions given by the flight attendant. I was literally locked to these instructions, simply because I wanted to be prepared to protect my daughter in the event that something went wrong on the flight. So as I listened and I realized that she was instructing me to secure my oxygen mask to my face BEFORE securing the mask for my daughter, I must admit that I was feeling so challenged. As a mother, I felt as if this would be so selfish of me to do something like that. The plane is going down, there is limited oxygen and I have to make a conscious decision to put my mask on before my daughter’s.
I pondered that question the entire flight. Honestly, if we needed those masks that day, I’m not sure if I would have followed the instructions of the flight attendant. I was a young mother and at that time, and the only thing that mattered to me was making sure that my baby girl was safe. I had carried her for 9 months 3 weeks and 6 days. I labored for 21 hours before having an emergency c-section to bring her into this world. No way would I watch her suffer to breathe while I put a mask on myself first. At least this is the way I thought that day.
Fast forward to today and shockingly, I think much differently. I would, in fact, put my mask on first! After marriage, the only thing I was concerned with was making my husband happy, at least for about the first two years or so. I was young, happy and married. After a few years of play time and travel we decided to have our first child, a beautiful baby girl. Then, my only concern was to be the best mom I could be. Fast forward a few more years and here comes baby number two… and the big whammy a brand new business just 30 days later! In a matter of what seems like a blink of an eye, I had become a wife, a mother of two and a full time entrepreneur. My life was chaotic to say the least and my mental, emotional and physical health was all over the place. I felt like I was trapped in the walls of a prison that I had created for myself! Of course I loved being a wife, mother and entrepreneur and everything that came with it, but I was clueless as to how much work it would involved until I was in way over my head!
I had to step back and do a mental recap. How in world did my life get so out of control? My marriage was falling apart. I had checked out as a mother and our business was experiencing major losses with the highest employee turnover rate I had ever seen in my life! At times, I literally felt like I couldn’t breathe! Then I remember the instructions of the flight attendant. It was like I was recalling the words of an angel…
“In the event of a decompression, an oxygen mask will automatically appear in front of you. Place it firmly over your nose and mouth, secure the elastic band behind your head, and breathe normally. If you are traveling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your mask on first, and then assist the other person.”
I began to think to myself “Could these instructions be used for more than just the flight? Could it be that we could actually apply these instructions to our daily lives?” I realized that for years I had been making sure that everyone in my family was “breathing” while I was suffocating! And yet I was depriving myself of everything. I wouldn’t even give myself five minutes of quiet time alone. I was on the brink of losing everything. My marriage, my family and our business was vanishing before my eyes.
I knew that I needed a plan to take control of my life. I wanted to breathe again. I wanted to enjoy my life, my marriage and my family. I wanted my business to be successful. I wanted peace and most importantly, I needed time to heal. I did something that I had never done before. I put my oxygen mask on first. I had finally realized that I was suffocating because I was not taking time out to care for myself. I wasn’t exercising. I wasn’t eating right. I wasn’t resting. I literally did nothing that was solely for me.
I finally decided that I was done being a Wonder Woman for everyone else and not myself, so I stopped. I literally stopped everything. For 21 days, I did nothing but concentrate on me. For 21 days, I prayed, meditated, and worked out at least twice a day. What an experience this was for me! I received so much clarity and peace during this time that I wondered why it took me so long to do something like this. I began to realize that my mind and body needed healing and restoration. I had been neglecting myself for so long that I didn’t realize just how bad of a mental state I was in.
Each day I was beginning to feel better. My mind was clearer. My body felt energized. My marriage was being restored. My children were no longer being neglected. I was feeling whole again. I could breathe again! I had no clue that life could be so grand, especially by putting myself first! I was finally putting myself in a better position to be the best wife and mom that I could possibly be.
When this lightbulb went off for me, I realized that I had discovered what I call FIT LIFE BALANCE. I found a way to put myself first without feeling guilty about it. I realized that I had to share my story with the world. I know that there are so many women that feel exactly how I felt, overwhelmed with daily tasks, roles and responsibilities. Wearing the many hats of a wife, mom and business owner can be rather stressful at times. I know that as a woman it can be difficult at times to think of ourselves first. But what I know for sure now is that Fit Life Balance is possible and it is necessary. If you fail to find balance, your marriage, your family, and your business will eventually suffer from your actions of neglecting yourself. As women, sometimes we forget to put the ourselves, our goals, and our needs anywhere on the list, let alone at the top of the list.
As an Extreme Life Coach and Accountability Partner, I am dedicated to using my life experiences and my ability to overcome seemingly life ending obstacles to empower my tribe of busy businesswomen who happen to be wives and mothers to DOMINATE their life by running the appropriate play at the appropriate time achieve FIT LIFE BALANCE. My primary objective is to help women to realize their true self worth and throw away the guilt of putting themselves first in order to ensure that their relationships, families, health and careers thrive!